Three Dads and an Uncle (Plus a Super-Texting Mom)

Three smiling faces. Two hybrids. Two blessings: one is to me, one is through me to my daughter. But that's just the surface. The best blessings are people.

Gratitude is my goal of expression here. When last year's blessing (2000 Toyota Camry driven by my daughter) died on the highway, it wasn't long before people started getting involved. The whole story is too long for a blog post, but let's just say it wasn't the best time to navigate such a situation!

Considering that my preferred course of action was to buy bicycles for the kids and keep driving my Honda Civic hybrid FOREVER, it feels like a miracle that I am the one in a practically new car! 

Miracle. What kind of miracle is buying a car? I could go on and on. Maybe I'll separate the lessons I've learned in this short little exercise into bite-sized morsels to write about later on. But for all practical purposes, let's just say that every blessing outside of a practical living expense has got to be inspired by God! (Not that living expenses aren't! I believe it is all His provision along the way. It's just that the planned and known provision is already stretched to miracle status to meet planned and known expenses. LOL)

Car shopping was something I would have laughed off until my dad got involved. Now it was real. His help was pledged, so the quest began. There's something for all of us to learn about trust and God if we have fathers like mine. :-)  Love you, Dad!

Car shopping is also overwhelming! The calls! The texts! The emails! The web cookies that bring cars on to every web browser page! Who knew I would need so much help? Evidently God did. People were alongside all the way. Even when car lots seemed more like a field of vultures, one of my dearest friends was there to help shoo them away or simply get me out of there! Thank you.

Before long, my mom and step-dad were researching cars. Then my uncle stepped into the ring and was plugging in VIN numbers as fast as my super-texting mom could conduct traffic between all of us.

Let me just say to all of you: THANK YOU. While I bumbled around and spent every available moment researching cars, you were all there for me to bounce options off of and offer information. Let me also say: I'M SORRY for inundating you with all the fragments of my mind! But I'm SO VERY THANKFUL that you were all there.

Now if you read the title of this post and have reached this point, you may have wondered (if you have a mathematical mind) where is the third dad?

Papa God is the other "dad" involved in this story. There is no way I can adequately thank or brag on Him, of course. But I do want to give glory to Him for seeing us through a difficult situation and making sure that we are better off on the other side. Only He knows how much I have wrestled with this blessing and the tears I have shed receiving such a wonderful gift.

So what does "give glory" really mean? I went to look it up just now in biblical terms. Interestingly enough, most of the ties I see involve money or wealth! That sounds like another subject to search out. We use words so loosely in modern culture!

But one word that applies (which is part of "kabowd" in Hebrew and translated "glory" in the Bible) is this: honor. That I can do! 

I honor You, Papa God.

Every blessing You have inspired
   I gratefully receive.
I acknowledge You ...

   Your love

   Your generosity

   Your majesty

   Your brilliance

Discovering Your blueprint in my life

   is my greatest adventure.

Thank You for every idea You have that involves me.

Your way of life is the greatest!
And thank You in particular
   for this unexpected bright blue blessing.
It's my "jubilee" car!
Thank You for all the help you inspired.
Bless every life and gift involved FAR more than they could ever dream.
(And even to the car lot vultures, I speak Your goodness and peace over them. May each one know the joy of life with You.)

Amen!

Shake It Out

So far, 2012 has been one for the books! The trials have been ones I would have rather not experienced ... EVER ... but at the same time, the triumphs are starting to build.  So much of that seemed showcased as my "little" Miss M (who is now officially a teenager) danced to "Shake It Out."

I can't watch her dance to those words without crying.  It's a pretty personal statement of her own struggle. She's had to wrestle a good bit of darkness.  And we're starting to see some real light at the end of the tunnel.  Tears come even now.

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaaah
And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

Son and Grandsons

Seeing my son hold his son for the first time? PRICELESS!  OK, family, for the rest of the photos, you can see them on Flickr or Facebook!

Express

It was effortless (well, almost) when I was young. Less filtered. More bold. I love seeing this in my kids ... At least when it is in a positive light! It does my heart good to see a talent expressed, enjoyed, pursued. It challenges me!

Honestly, even "negative" expressions challenge me. I shouldn't be afraid of the authentic emotions around me or even within me. It's an opportunity in a way. It's a window into the inner world that may go unacknowledged if left alone. It may need some nurture, some guidance, some encouragement, some prayer, some action.

The beauty of expression is something deep and wonderful. I don't know if it's possible to know that fully in one's lifetime, but I have a feeling it is a treasure to be gained when one can find the freedom to wear one's heart upon his or her sleeve. I just hope the effort is rewarded by the people who mean the most when it is!

Shoes ... Dead or Alive

Did you know point shoes can die? The technical term, from what I understand is ... (get ready) ... dead. They are just dead. So, thankfully, my little dancer has regained life with her new pointe shoes just in time for Parents' Week at her studio.  We are preparing for the recital (MAY 19 for friends and family in the area)!  She will be doing seven numbers, so it won't even be like one of those recitals where you sit through the whole thing just to see one dance.  Plus ... you will get to see the ever-dramatic solo, "Howl."  Maybe we can take over a restaurant afterwards.  You are all welcome to join us!

Smiles ... More Important Than Anyone Knows

This week has held struggles and smiles ... like most every week, it seems!  And as I work with photos of Girl Scouts (on Girl Scout Leaders Day, nonetheless) I see so many moments where adults have brought smiles to girls as they learn and experience and grow.

I am ESPECIALLY thankful this week because the smiles have made the difference in some of the biggest ways to the girl who is the most special to me ... my daughter.  It feels like God orchestrated some truly wonderful things from friends old and new to encourage both of us.  A few know the struggles, and if you're one who is reading this, you'll be glad to know that the smile you see on her face here was how the week ended and has continued.

Thank you.  Thank you to family and to friends and to church leaders and to Girl Scout leaders for bringing those smiles.  They are more important than you know!

Four Generations

This was a gift to me, to my mother, and most of all to my son ... time with precious Aiden.

High Intensity

Today was spent on the dance/competition floor at Talent on Parade. Miss M had HIGH hopes for placing first in her division and doing another round of Top Stars. Alas, a fourth place scoring prevented that (and we will be learning from the judges' comments for sure as I thought she really was strong)! But you know what I love? She received one of the "Judges' Choice" awards - only 10 in her whole age category.  That means that regardless of scoring, her performance caught the judges' eye and made her stand out.  Her award? HIGH INTENSITY ... She should be VERY proud (I know I am)!

I may have to post photos later of her creative surprise for her grandparents who came to watch the competition.  Let's say it involved a car "paint" marker and the windows of their Cadillac!  I have to laugh.

Emerging

This is my son ... nearly 19 years ago.  This is the smile and laughter and light in his eyes that made me so proud to be his mom.  What an amazing experience.  What a frightening experience!  Frightening because this life is developing its first impressions of everything in my care.  I made some mistakes.  But I also did some great things.  And I saw great things in him ... then and now.

As the years went by and some of the mistakes went unnoticed or more mistakes were made in trying to make up for the previous ones, the laughter all but disappeared.  It's been a personal heartache that the laughter changed, that the light in his eyes dimmed, and that he had to experience anything that got in the way of the amazing person God created to emerge into this world.

But I'm humbly changed and thankful and proud.  On his own two feet, he is experiencing not just some hard things ... but recently some wonderful ones as well.  I won't tell his story, but I will publicly say I am proud of him for following his heart.

And as I reflect on motherhood, it makes me reflect on godliness ... makes me want to be closer to God, closer to my children, and a better mother/daughter/friend/sister.  I'm so horribly imperfect and a workaholic and sometimes consumed by just making it through the tough places.  But I have my feet on the path.  And that's a good place to be.

Laughter

Always a welcome sound ... laughter was a big part of a rousing game of horseshoes with Uncle James at grandma and grandpa's house in Kansas.  (And even though I couldn't capture the action clearly, I still love this photo!)

Turning Entanglement To Art

Sometimes life is bland and flat ... other times it's a tangled mess ... it can be a party ... or it can be the residue from others that is left for me to clean up.  It can look like nothing or an intricate maze.  What makes life beautiful? Perspective.

Maybe my life is all tangled.
Maybe the bright splashes are to be celebrated instead of figured out.
Maybe daily life is a slab of ordinary underneath everything.
But it could be that if I look closer, maybe it's art.

I'm considering adopting a new motto:  Never untangle ... find the beauty.

Howl

And so she performs ... the "wolf" performing to Howl (by Florence + the Machine).  She loved the drama of this dance!  It was a tough competition this year (the younger girls didn't place) but it's only the first.  Here we go!

Cake and Laughter

Turning 12 while waiting for a Disney adventure had highlights of its own.  From finding a cake and candles to forgetting matches ... and having hotel staff offer to sing but finding instead when we returned a lobby FULL of business men ... we found plenty of moments to laugh.

Stars and Stripes (and SWIRLS)

This year, our celebration involved children ... always a treat!  For the past few summers, my kids have been in Ohio on visitation.  Even though J is grown and living there now (and couldn't come here), M had to return for dance nationals and her dad was no longer able to attend, so she was flown in a day early.  She was just in time to be part of a birthday party for Uncle J and Miss P.  We even had a delightful accompaniment to fireworks on bongo drums!

Aiden Christopher Leitnick

March 23, 2011 at 5:56 p.m., little Aiden Christopher Leitnick showed up 8 lbs. 3 oz. and 21 inches long ... bringing a whole new generation to the family!  Madison is SO excited to be an aunt.  When she heard the news, there were screams of delight.  We were anxiously awaiting photos ... and even though I promised I'd check first thing in the morning, she is the one who knocked on my door to show me the photo (I don't know HOW she woke up so early).  This GRANDMOTHER thing has had its first moments of reality.  Funny how Jeremy's call saying that Sarah was in labor just flipped some kind of switch!  It's quite an amazing time.

Suburban Sleigh Ride

Happy Birthday, Mom!

Before I do anything else today (and the opportunities are HUGE as I have the day off and at least a dozen projects in flux) ... I want to be sure I publicly wish my mom a VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

I just happened to ask if there were plans for celebrating her birthday, thinking that I'd probably be able to make time to crash the event with some other Tulsa relatives, and was surprised to find that having special birthday dinners with my step-dad was more of the default and not the actual plan. And it hit me. She's a mom! Moms do everything for others ... They work to make the world go 'round and it doesn't always come back to them. (I'm learning.)

So this weekend, even though time is tight, we had enough to meet partway for a special birthday lunch in Independence, KS at an Italian restaurant Bella Vita. We arranged a special birthday surprise ... didn't they do a nice job? Of course, we also did our traditional birthday blessing (each of us wrote down how she has blessed us and reads it in the group as a way of honoring her), which I can never do without tears. But I get more teary-eyed thinking that we haven't done this for my mom enough!!!

So, Mom, I hope this year is one of the best ever for you. You deserve it! I won't get all mushy-gushy online ... just know you're loved!

My Daughter, The Butterfly

I am a proud mom! This year has been extra-special because it was her first duet and part of a scene in which two of her dance studio friends were also performing ... so the rehearsal days have flown (literally!) as have the performances.

Happy 11th Birthday, Miss M!

OK ... so I'm VERY late posting anything about Miss M's birthday ... but it was a WHIRLWIND! So, I'll back date this post so she can have a proper post on her birthday. Actually, she wanted a whole birthday page like her brother, but I don't know if I have it in me to do another one until she's 18!

Instead, we exhausted ourselves with another kind of surprise: a room makeover! As her schoolbus pulled away, Grandma and Grandpa pulled in. And away we went. I was furiously packing. And while I ran to work for a meeting, they continued the mad dash to move furniture, pack up extra stuff, find supplies to make a ballet barre, and get cranking on the project.

When she arrived home, when she looked down the hall to her room, instead of seeing her bed and night stand, she saw this (minus her, of course)! "WHAT HAPPENED TO MY ROOM?!?!" Madame R.E. and myself were responsible for creating the hot pink reading corner with chocolate and gold curtains, and the grandparents took Miss M shopping for a cool lamp the next day.

But the birthday surprises didn't end there ... dinner with the family who could come was quite a treat, a new FAVE CD and help relocating the pink chandelier from Uncle J, and the mad dash to get an iPod the next night courtesy of her dad and grandfather's checks topped it all off.

And there you have it ... birthday #11!

My Boy is 18!!!

I'm not sure how that is possible ... and yet the road certainly seems that long when viewed in certain ways.  There have been shining moments and dark days.  But one thing remains, I love him.  For friends and family who don't know, we tried a move to Ohio to see if it helped bring an uphill curve, so it's been very different without him in Oklahoma!  And celebrating special days is not very easy.  I probably went a little bit overboard compiling all kinds of memories for his birthday, but here's his own blog page from my heart:  http://indigobleue.blogspot.com/p/happy-birthday-jeremy.html